Hi everybody! My name is Emily Hendricks, I’m 17, and I’m a junior at Avon Grove High School. Okay, let me ask you all a question before I get started: How many people here can honestly say that they’ve ever really, truly been in love? I mean true, honest-to-goodness, can’t-live-without-you, do-anything-for-you, love? I personally don’t think you can experience that kind of true, unconditional love with a human being until you are completely, truly in love with Jesus Christ. Because THAT is what TRUE love is all about. Salvation. Let me tell you how I reached that conclusion.

I probably had about 6 or 7 "boyfriends" between 5th and 8th grade, but it was mostly what my parents would call puppy love (things like, "Ooh, we’re holding hands!" Or, even better, "Oh my gosh–he KISSED me!"). Then, in my freshman year of high school, I found myself in way over my head. Before I realized it, I was involved in a very intense relationship with an older guy (he was a senior at the time). The whole time we were dating I was so caught up in the fact that I was being "accepted" in high school, that I was blind to reality. He told me we were going to be together forever, and that he would always love me and no one else–I was in love (or so I thought). My friends had been telling me all along that I shouldn’t be dating him, that he would only get me into trouble, but I didn’t listen. I said to them, "Oh, you don’t know him the way I do," and stuff like that. It took me 3½ months to realize that this guy, who I thought was so in love with me, only wanted one thing–sex. And the reason he was dating me–an "easy" freshman–was because he knew he could get it (or so he thought). It took me 3½ months to realize what his real motives were. And as soon as he realized he wasn’t going to get what he wanted, he broke up with me, and I ran crying to my friends saying how stupid and blind I had been, and how they had been right all along. I wasted so much time, energy, tears, and even money on him, and he acted like I didn’t exist anymore, like nothing had ever happened between us, even though he said we were "still friends." He even said he still wanted me to go to prom with him, only to find out 2 weeks before-hand that he was taking someone else. As a freshman, my world was coming to an end. He had broken my heart, shattered my dreams, and treated me like trash–and it hurt, to say the least. I never wanted to go through anything like that again, so I boldly said, "I’m never going to date again until I’m out of high school!" Well, that summer, something happened (a few things actually) that changed my view on that commitment.

That summer, GZ went on a mission trip to West Virginia. One of the first nights we were there, we had our time of worship by candlelight, and i,t was POWERFUL. I’m not really sure what it was exactly–maybe it was the candles, or the music, or maybe just the presence of God in a room that size full of teens totally sold out for Christ–whatever it was, I finally realized that God had not been the focus of my life for some time now, especially during those 3½ months I had been with my boyfriend. So I prayed and cried, and prayed and cried, and prayed and cried some more–and then suddenly, the burden was lifted, and God was looking down on me and he was SMILING! While I was standing there singing and praying with a tear-stained face, Patti came up to me and said she had a message for me, but it wasn’t from her–it was from God. She said that God had a plan for me. He had a reason for me bring on the trip, and if I would only make Him the top priority in my life, putting everything else aside (including guys and dating), and totally devote my life to Him, He would do great things in me and through me. It was truly an answer to my prayers, because for the longest time I had been praying for God to show me what He wanted me to do, and how to become a better Christian; and the answer came in the form of a guardian angel–what a blessing! A close friend of mine also told me something that night. He gave me the simplest yet the most important advice I’ve ever received: "Don’t ever let anything come between you and God...EVER!" And that really stuck with me, because it’s tough to do! So, later on during the trip, when I was thinking about how I was going to lay everything aside for Christ and how tough it was going to be to not let anything come between me and God (especially guys), Lindsay Pincin and I got to talking. I was surprised to find out that she had never had a boyfriend (even ever liked a guy, for that matter). I didn’t think I could ever do that. She told me that she didn’t think she was ready to have a boyfriend until she "got giddy" for God (the whole sweaty palms, butterflies in you stomach, shivers down your back feeling you get when you’re around someone you really like). She wanted to date God for a while before she made that kind of commitment to someone else. That really inspired me. So I restated my commitment to God. This time I said I wasn’t going to date until I was ready; until I was completely right with and in love with God; and I was going to wait until HE brought the right person into my life.

Now, of course, things only got harder once I made that commitment. There was a lot of lust and a lot of temptation (and I didn’t always handle it the right way), but I got through it with God’s strength on my side. I went more than a year without dating anyone, and it was GREAT! I was living completely for Him, and I was having the time of my life!

In February of last year, Pastor Mike asked me to talk at GZ about my past with dating and my commitment not to date until I was ready. In that testimony I said, "Some people think you need to date around and try other people on so-to-speak before they find the right one. I believe that God will bring that person into my life at just the right time, and it will be wonderful." Well, guess what! God DID bring that person into my life at JUST the right time and it IS wonderful! Just over a year after my heartbreak fiasco in 9th grade, I found out that the guy that I "sort of liked" "sort of liked" me too! And the rest is history! "Sort of like" turned into really like, and really like turned into love. We know that it is right and true love because true love constantly grows, matures, and deepens in knowledge and insight, and that’s what has been happening in our relationship for that past 10 months! We knew that it was the right time, because both of us were completely sold out for God, and had totally committed our lives to Him and His will. God brought us together at just the right time (God’s timing is ALWAYS best), and God will keep us together. I don’t know what the future hold for us, but I do know that I am exactly where God wants me to be right now. I know what I would LIKE the future to hold, but the best I can hope for is God’s will fpr my life and that I will be open to it. In our relationship, we make sure to keep God in sight, remembering that had it not been for Him, we wouldn’t be together. And if either of us loses sight of God, or stumbles on our walk with Christ, we talk about it, and help each other up. We pray and do devotions together, and it has only helped our relationship to be firmly grounded in the Word of God. If something gets between one (or both) of us and God, we make sure to discuss it and do our best to fix it. Philippians 4:13 says, "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." At all times we are aware that we cannot do anything without the love and strength of Christ on our side.

Now, I’m going to really get real here for a minute. In any dating relationship, there is a natural longing for some degree of physicalness–you can’t avoid it! You just need to be sure it doesn’t become the center of the relationship. I’ll be honest, in my relationship with my boyfriend there is some physicalness, but it is of little importance to us. We know that we could have just as deep of an intimate and spiritually-based relationship if there was no physicalness at all. But, like I said, there is that natural desire fro physical intimacy, and that’s okay! Just as long as that’s not what the relationship is based on. But don’t let it get out of hand! As Pastor Mike has said before, physicalness is like a stepladder: once you reach a certain step, you don’t want to go back. You start up where you left off, and rarely ever look back. And that’s where some people get themselves into trouble. Now, I’m not here to condemn anyone, because I’ve been there; I know what it’s like to let a relationship become a physical relationship and nothing more. Just please don’t give anything away that you won’t be able to take back. I’m talking about your virginity. Once you give that away, there’s no getting that back. I don’t know about you, but I want to be able to say to my spouse, in the words of Tara Dawn Christensen, "I saved myself for you." You’ve probably heard the saying, "Every time you say ‘I love you’ you give a piece of your heart away." So, don’t say I love you to anyone unless you really mean it.

As I look back on my past relationships, heartbreak, the times I’ve let the physicalness go a little too far for comfort, and all the times I’ve said "I love you," I realize that those experiences have made me who I am today. I have few regrets about my dating experiences because I believe that everything happens for a reason, every person is placed in your life for a purpose, and every experience has a lesson to teach. Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." We just need to remember to look for the good in all situations, rather than always asking God "Why?" and wallowing in our misery.

In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, God gives us a very good example of what TRUE love really is: "Love is patient, love is kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand it’s own way. Love is not irritable, and keeps no record of wrongs. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." That’s it. God’s PERFECT love endures forever!

Listen, bottom line, you have to be in love with God before you can truly be in love with anyone else. Because, after all, God’s love is the greatest love of all! "This is my prayer for you: That your love will grow more and more; that you will have knowledge and understanding with your love; that you will see the difference between good and bad and will choose the good; that you will be pure and without wrong for the coming of Christ." That is my prayer for you (from Philippians 1:9-10). Jesus died for each and every one of us! For you, and for me. And THAT, my friends, is what TRUE love is all about!