Whether you are age 18, 21, 35 or 50, the question remains the same.   Parents ask their high school juniors this question at increasing frequency as their teens near graduation.   College roommates spend time discussing tricks for navigating the job search gauntlet balancing a need to pay the bills with trying to find a job they will enjoy.  Young- Marrieds look for ways to make their lives count.   Empty-Nesters ask where the time went.   The almost-retired seek meaningful ways to take what they have learned in life and put it to productive use in the last third of their time this side of heaven.  

Some call it “The Meaning of Life.”  Viktor Frankl titled his book, “Man’s Search for Meaning.”   Filmmakers have tried to capture the theme in “It’s a Wonderful Life” or more recently “the Pursuit of Happiness.” Stories of what is really important in life echo in “Hook” and “The Santa Clause 3.”  Rick Warren’s “The Purpose Driven Life” has sold 25 million copies.   I get the sense that we are hungry for an answer but few have been successful at understanding it, and even fewer are able to articulate it.

StevePavlina.com shares a list of 374 values and asks, “What should you live for? Wealth? Power? Service? Longevity? Reason? Love? Faith? Family? God? Virtue? Happiness? Fulfillment? Comfort? Contentment? Integrity?”  He suggests writing every answer you can think of to the question, “What is my true purpose in life?” for either 60 minutes, or until you write something so moving that it makes you cry.  He asserts, “when you cry, you’ve found your purpose.”  I will credit Mr. Pavlina with contriving an interesting approach; one that just might work for a number of people.   But if it indeed helps an 18 year old, who is debating between taking the SATs and going to a concert this weekend, to find his or her purpose in life then I want to know why it works. 

A youth pastor once told me, “Too many people go through life as ‘human-doings’ and while that is fine and well and good, it is not what we were created for.   We were created as ‘human-beings.’  An important part of our life is the part where we simply sit quietly and just ‘be’ in a place where we just exist and reflect and enjoy everything that God has blessed us with.”   My friend was reminding me that we don’t do this enough anymore, and after reading Mr. Pavlina’s blog, I believe that he would agree.  So let me offer my own three step approach to the problem at hand.  

 Step 1:  Figuring out “what you are going to do with your life” requires stopping, sitting, being quiet, reflecting, and examining who God created you to be with all your talents, abilities, loves, & passions.  You will surely generate quite the list, but I’m not convinced you will find much substance in it.   However, value may be found in the process.  Once you have emptied your proverbial cup, exhausting your resources in yourself and in the things of this world in the process generating this list, and turning up answers which will never satisfy and never fulfill the longings in your heart, you can pause & begin again. 

Step 2: This time, with your heart open to the answer, with your mind uncluttered of your own ideas of how you’ll get from point A to point B (and what you plan to accomplish along the way), pause and ask the creator Himself what He has called you to do with you life.  

Step 3:  After you have asked God the question at hand, figuring out “what you are going to do with your life” merely involves shutting up, staying quiet, and remaining still long enough to hear the answer.   This, no-doubt, is the hardest part.

Our current culture teaches young people to live our lives without discipline, without margin, without stillness, without rest, without reflection, and without introspection.  We rush from place to place, event to event, making sure we turn out well-rounded.  And we may very well achieve that desired rounded shape.  Unfortunately, the process that makes us round, also leaves us hollow on the inside.   It’s very difficult to keep an eye on the big picture of our lives while we are busy cramming every ounce of existence into the current moment.

Speaking to high school students for a moment:  I want to encourage you to go to a four year college.  You’ll learn a lot of book knowledge, but more-so, you’ll grow as a person from the experience of it all.   However, I recommend that you wait to start college until you have a fairly clear direction on where your life is headed.   Notice that I didn’t say, “a clear direction of where YOU want your life to go.”   You need to know where God is directing your life.  If you are open minded about seeking His plan, you will be amazed how often His ways parallel the desires of your heart (Psalms 37:4). 

If you do not know where you are heading after high school, evaluate some programs that will give you some interesting life experience and may get you college credit while giving you time to explore the plan God has for your life.  Some ideas include MissionYear.com, PeaceCorp.gov, DreamCenter.org, HonorAcademy.com, or Ground Zero Master’s Commission.