My name is Christine, and I am 20 years old.

Looking back, in the grand scheme of life, my dating experience was barely a blip on the radar. Though short and brief, it has had one of the biggest impacts on my life. Even now, 3 years later, my relationships with friends and family, are affected on a daily bases because of that one relationship.

I had my first boyfriend when I was 16. Growing up, I never saw the need, and I didn’t have the desire, to have a boyfriend, so I didn’t date. It was during my sophomore year that something changed though. I began feeling like something was missing. I didn’t know what it was, but as I began to look around, I realized that everyone around me was dating, and they seemed happy. So, in my mind, I figured that dating was the answer to my problems.

I didn’t set out on a mission to find a boyfriend, or meet someone. In fact, other guys came along before I started dating and asked me out, but I just knew none of them were it. Then one day, someone walked into my life, and over time I knew that he was the one. I felt safe with him, and I felt like I could trust him completely.

We started dating, and everything was great and wonderful. I was happy, and that feeling like something was missing was gone. After a while however, the feeling returned even stronger then before. I didn’t want to admit it at first, but I knew that I had to break up with him. I knew that if I didn’t, I would only have become more unhappy, and would hurt him more in the end. So, I ended it.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t exactly a smooth break. Actually, it was a really really bad break-up. Over the months that followed, he completely changed, and a lot of crazy stuff happened. He told a lot of lies, did a lot of stuff that he said he would never do, and emotionally he really hurt me. There were times that even physically I was in danger. The person that I had trusted, turned out to be in the one person I couldn’t trust at all. It was one of the scariest times of my life, but I kept it all in, and didn’t let anyone know. As a result, I found it harder and harder to trust people. I felt like I had to put walls up with everyone, and not let them in. I had a lot of scars from that relationship, and still do. God is still having to heal me of a lot of pain and hurt that I still feel from it.

After we broke up, I did think about dating again. I “talked” to a few guys, and even went out on a date with someone, but none of it felt right. I found myself with more problems then before, and I still had that feeling in the pit of my soul like something was missing.

One day, I was at Ground Zero, and I was sitting in the back pew thinking about all those relationships in my life, wondering what exactly was missing in my life, and trying to figure out how to handle it all. It was then that God said just one thing to me. “If you want to have a relationship with someone else, you need to first have a relationship with me. Your vertical relationship with me is more important then your horizontal relationships with other people.”

So sitting on the back pew, I decided that I was through. I wasn’t going to date, I was going to focus on my relationship with God.

That was three years ago. I haven’t dated since, and I haven’t felt like anything was missing since that night. There has been guys that have come along, even ones that I’ve really liked, but I knew that it wasn’t my timing. God is still healing me, and brining me closer to Him.

Over the last three years, God has changed me a lot. I truly believe a reason why I have been changed so much is because I haven’t had any distractions. My time and attention hasn’t been on dating, it’s been on my Maker. God has taught me a lot over the last three years. He has taught me the difference between wanting something and needing something, and that my relationship with Him should be the only one that I need. I know that God is going to bring someone into my life, in His timing. God reminds me all the time that right now, He is preparing me for my future husband, and just as He is preparing me, He is preparing my future husband. At times it has been hard waiting, but at the same time, it’s been really easy. I know that God’s timing is always perfect, and He has a reason for this single period in my life. I have come to a point where, with each passing day, I become more excited about who God is going to bring into my life, and when. I know that God is going to bring someone into my life that I was created to be with, and who was created to be with me. God has someone who isn’t just going to be my partner in life, but also my partner in the calling that God has placed before me. I know that God is going to bring someone into my life that is going to set this world on fire for Jesus Christ with me. I can’t be unhappy or depressed about being single, when I know that more blessings then I can count await me just around the corner.

Have I wanted to date? At times, yes. Has there been temptations? So many that I don’t think I can count them all. But I serve a faithful God that knows me inside and out. He has given me a way out of every temptation, and He has provided for every need that I have. I wouldn’t trade in my time with my ex-boyfriend, or the last three years for anything. I have amazing friends and family that support me, a job that I love more then anything, and an amazing and blessed life.

There has been many times that I have stopped, just to thank God that I am single, and that He has me in this season right now.